MyThoughts

Welcome 2010!
New Year's Resolution Guidelines
     Happy New Year everyone!  I am writing this special edition blog in hopes of helping my readers to have a more fulfilling and productive life in 2010.  Many people create New Year's Resolutions but have trouble initiating them or maintaining consistency with them.  I would like to share some history of New Year's Resolutions as well as some guidelines for setting and maintaining them.
     The idea of New Year's Resolutions is estimated to date back to Rome in 153 B.C.  January, the first month of the year in Rome was so named after Janus, the god of beginnings and the guardian of doors and entrances.  Janus was depicted as having two faces, one in the front and one in the back which enabled him to gaze forward and backward simultaneously.  The ancient Romans envisioned Janus looking back on the old year and forward to the new year at midnight on December 31st.  Thus, Janus became known as the symbol for New Year's Resolutions.          
     Here are some tips for setting New Year's Resoutions that will have a lasting impact:
1)  Determine what could have been done differently in 2009.
     Using Janus as a model, it is helpful to look back to 2009 to figure out why your aspirations were not met while simultaneously looking ahead to 2010 to see what can be done differently.  Example: "In 2009 my goal was to start exercising more but, I never made the effort to join a gym or an exercise class."  "This year (2010) I will find an affordable gym in hope that it will motivate me to start exercising."  Putting in the effort and spending the money could act as the propellant that was absent in 2009.
2)  Create specific goals and objectives. 
     Many people set goals that are too general.  For example, "I want to lose weight this year."  Be more specific by saying someting like, "I want to lose 38 pounds in six months."  This gives the amount of weight to lose and the duration in which it is to be achieved.  A goal is a major task that is to be accomplished over a longer period of time while objectives are smaller, incremental tasks that can be fulfilled to aid in reaching the overarching goal.  If the goal is to lose 38 pounds in six months then some objectives might be to start exercising three times per week for 30 minutes or to limit all liquid intake to water and tea for the next six months.
3)  Implement realistic goals and objectives.
     All too often, people set goals that are too much to handle.  For instance, if your goal is to start exercising and you have not exercised in 12 years, then starting off by trying to exercise three hours a day for five days a week is not a good idea.  This will only dicourage you from ever wanting to exercise again.  It is important to start out with small goals that can be realistically achieved in the time span that was set.  Achieving one small goal will only encourage you to want to work toward achieving another.  
4)  Reward yourself.
     Use positive reinforcement by rewarding yourself when you accomplish a goal or objective.  It is important that the reward does not contradict your resolution.  For instance, it will not be helpful to reward yourself with doughnuts and sweets after you have lost your initial five pounds.  Instead, set aside some money for an article of clothing that you want to purchase when you reach your intended weight.  That reward is congruent to the goal which will only provide more motivation to accomplish it rather than to sabotage it.
       
Sincerely,

Nathan M. Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC

Nathan M. Comerford is a psychotherapist in Farmington Hills, MI who has been helping people with their relationship issues, emotional difficulties and mental health problems for the past 9 years. 

Thought Perspectives Counseling, PLLC
31275 Northwestern Hwy., Suite 120
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
Phone: (248) 225-5259
www.thoughtperspectives.com

• If you or someone you know needs to speak to someone regarding relationship issues, emotional difficulties or mental health problems, help is a phone call away.  Schedule an appointment today!
  Just call (248) 225-5259 to set up an appointment with
  Nathan Comerford, MA LLPC NCC.
      
  Visit www.thoughtperspectives.com for more information on counseling and psychotherapy!
  
  Visit the "Ask the Counselor" Blog at:www.thoughtperspectives.com/blog
  

This is the final installment of my series on "Expectations of Therapy".  While I decided to write about this subject last, it is perhaps one of the most important.  I am referring to the fears and and reservations that prevent people in need from seeking help from a professional counselor or psychotherapist.  Let me guide you through a few of the more common hindrances:

• Fear of being labeled: There are some people who forego seeking help from a psychotherapist for fear of being labeled as crazy, psychotic, neurotic or some derivation thereof.  Others may fear a diagnosis of Depression, Bipolar Disorder or some other disorder.  For the most part, I try to avoid labeling or diagnsoses in my practice.  However, there are certain times when they are appropriate.  In order to conquer something, it is sometimes necessary to know what it is you are fighting.  If I do find it necessary to disclose a diagnosis to someone, it is done when I feel the time is right with the utmost delicacy and respect for the person.  This is something that only a trained and seasoned psychotherapist can know how to do properly. 
• Fear of disclosing personal information: It can be intimidating for some people to disclose highly personal information to someone that they just met.  This is exactly why I do an evaluation with every new client.  This enables both of us to get to know each other before any major decisions are made regarding the counseling process.  Contrarily, disclosing personal information to a therapist you do not know has its benefits.  The fact that a counselor is not a friend or family member can actually make it easier for the counselor to help you.  The advice of friends and family members can often be colored with biases, judgments, or preconceptions.  Not only do counselors work to be objective and non-judgmental with their clients, that is what they are trained to do. 
• Cost of treatment: People often cite the cost of treatment as a major reason for foregoing therapy.  One thing I have learned throughout my career is that money itself is rarely the issue, the issue is what money represents in the person's mind (security, safety, power, etc.).  Many times my clients end up being more financially well-off and secure because I help them to overcome the issues that were preventing them from being successful (depression, anxiety, self-esteem, etc.).  I also understand that there are some people that are going through financial hardship and to those I offer several different options for quality treatment at a price that they can afford.

     That wraps up my thoughts on some of the expectations of therapy.  I hope this was helpful in spurring those of you who have been hesitant to seek help to do so at this time.  I also hope that this was helpful for those of you who might be trying to sway someone else to seek help.  I will be writing a blog in the first week of January in order to address New Year's resolutions and starting off 2010 on the right foot.  Until then, enjoy the rest of the holiday season and Happy New Year!

 
Sincerely,

Nathan M. Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC

Nathan M. Comerford is a psychotherapist in Farmington Hills, MI who has been helping people with their relationship issues, emotional difficulties and mental health problems for the past 9 years. 

Thought Perspectives Counseling, PLLC
31275 Northwestern Hwy., Suite 120
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
Phone: (248) 225-5259
www.thoughtperspectives.com

• If you or someone you know needs to speak to someone regarding relationship issues, emotional difficulties or mental health problems, help is a phone call away.  Schedule an appointment today!
  Just call (248) 225-5259 to set up an appointment with
  Nathan Comerford, MA LLPC NCC.
      
  Visit www.thoughtperspectives.com for more information on counseling and psychotherapy!
  
  Visit the "Ask the Counselor" Blog at:www.thoughtperspectives.com/blog
  

Initial Session 
     As promised in my last entry, I will be discussing what to expect during the initial session.  The initial session is the first in a series of sessions which encompass the evaluation period.  Even though I briefly synopsized the evaluation process in my September 2009 newsletter (the first installment of "Expectations of Therapy") I will give a brief recap this month as well.  
      The evaluation is approximately 3-5 sessions depending on the nature of the problems and how many people are present.  During the evaluation, I would be gathering info about the nature and history of the problem.  I would also be asking questions about family history and previous therapy experiences.  At the end of the evaluation, I then give my thoughts as to what I believe is going on and what direction I believe would be most helpful.  The evaluation also gives the client(s) a chance to get some idea of who I am and, if we decide to continue, whether they would be comfortable working with me. 
     The evaluation that I conduct is no different than an evaluation a medical doctor would perform.  If someone consulted a doctor for pain in their lower back, the doctor would want to first run a series of tests in order to find out exactly what the problem was before treating it.  The evaluation gives me a chance to learn about the nature and causes of the underlying problems rather than using conjecture and running the risk of misdiagnosis.
     Listed below are some of the topics that I usually try to cover during the initial session:

• The nature and duration of the presenting problem(s): It is helpful for me to get the client's perspective on what they believe the problems are and when they originated.
• Employment: I like to find out the nature and length of employment as well as how the presenting problem(s) may be affecting performance at work.
• Previous therapy experiences: This will give me a good idea of one's familiarity with the process of therapy and what has and has not worked for them in the past.
• Expectations of treatment: Right from the beginning of therapy, I implore my clients to think about what they want their lives to look like at the completion of treatment.
• Medical/psychiatric problems: Certain medical problems, medical drugs, psychiatric problems and especially psychiatric medications can affect the process and outcome of treatment.  It is beneficial for me to know these things from the genesis of treatment.
• Family history: I will usually ask about the family history of mental illness, addiction, and abuse.  I also ask clients to give me a glimpse of what it was like growing up in their family household as well as what their relationships were like with their parents and siblings. 

     Next month I will be wrapping up this series on the expectiations of therapy by reviewing some of the fears and reservations that delay or prevent people from seeking help from a professional counselor or psychotherapist.  Happy holidays!
    


Sincerely,

Nathan M. Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC

Nathan M. Comerford is a psychotherapist in Farmington Hills, MI who has been helping people with their relationship issues, emotional difficulties and mental health problems for the past 8 years. 

Thought Perspectives Counseling, PLLC
31275 Northwestern Hwy., Suite 120
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
Phone: (248) 225-5259
www.thoughtperspectives.com

• If you or someone you know needs to speak to someone regarding relationship issues, emotional difficulties or mental health problems, help is a phone call away.  Schedule an appointment today!
  Just call (248) 225-5259 to set up an appointment with
  Nathan Comerford, MA LLPC NCC.
      
  Visit www.thoughtperspectives.com for more information on counseling and psychotherapy!
  
  Visit the "Ask the Counselor" Blog at:www.thoughtperspectives.com/blog
  

Initial Office Visit 
     In last month's entry I outlined the beginning process of therapy which usually takes place by phone or email.  This month I would like to give readers a preview of what an initial office visit is like.  Some people are skeptical about going to therapy or counseling for the first time or going to a new psychotherapist when they do not know what to expect.  I will attempt to delineate the process in order to eliminate any quandaries.  
Office Environment
     My office is located in beautiful Farmington Hills, MI just off of the northwest corner of 13 Mile Rd. and Northwestern Highway in "The Offices of Woodcreek".  The parking lot is easily accessible from 13 Mile Rd. or from Northwestern Highway.  The office is on the main level right off of the main entrance which provides convenience for those who may be suffering from Agoraphobia, Panic Disorder or Claustrophobia.  There are separate entrance and exit doors which provide an additional level of confidentiality.  The inside of the office is a serene and calming environment which many patients describe as warm, friendly and professional.  
Initial Visit    
     I usually request that all new patients arrive 10-15 minutes early to fill out some paperwork before the commencement of the session.  You will be greeted in the waiting room by myself or by my administrative assistant Fran.  There are two forms that I have everyone fill out.  The first form is a general information form that provides me with your name, address, employment info and insurance information.  The second form outlines the policies and business practices to which I adhere and requires a signature stating that you understand those policies and will abide by them.  After the paperwork is filled out, I will escort you from the waiting room to my office where we will begin our session.  
     Next month I will provide an abstract of what is usually discussed within the first session.   

Sincerely,

Nathan M. Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC

Nathan M. Comerford is a psychotherapist in Farmington Hills, MI who has been helping people with their relationship issues, emotional difficulties and mental health problems for the past 8 years. 

Thought Perspectives Counseling, PLLC
31275 Northwestern Hwy., Suite 120
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
Phone: (248) 225-5259
www.thoughtperspectives.com

• If you or someone you know needs to speak to someone regarding relationship issues, emotional difficulties or mental health problems, help is a phone call away.  Schedule an appointment today!
  Just call (248) 225-5259 to set up an appointment with
  Nathan Comerford, MA LLPC NCC.
      
  Visit www.thoughtperspectives.com for more information on counseling and psychotherapy!
  
  Visit the "Ask the Counselor" Blog at:www.thoughtperspectives.com/blog
  

     In this month's blog I would like to wrap up this series on depression by discussing some of the causes of depression.  Contrary to popular belief, there is no concrete evidence that depression is genetically inherited or that it is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain.  There are some research studies that show some slight evidence for those two things as being contributing factors to depression but the research in general is inconclusive.  Depression for the most part is caused by psychological factors which means that psychotropic drugs such as antidepressants will do little to cure depression.  Antidepressants are a palliative approach to treating depression which means that they only work on relieving the symptoms of depression such as irritable mood, insomnia, hypersomnia, or fatigue.  They do not work on treating the psychological root of the problem which is why psychotherapy is recommended to help alleviate depression from the underlying cause.

What are the true causes of depression?

• Depression is centered on a sense of loss.  In essence, the depressed person feels that he has lost someting that is essential to his happiness or survival.  This could include the loss of a loved one, the loss of a job, feeling that youth or physical attractiveness is lost, or many other things.  Whatever the sense of loss is centered around, the feelings engendered by it are equivalent to feeling that life will never be complete or fulfilling.
• The gap of where one thinks they should be in life and where they actually are in life is too great.  An example of this would be a woman who feels that she should have accomplished much more in her life by age 40.  She feels depressed because she thought she would have been married, graduated from college and started a family by 40.  Depression occurs in these situations when people feel that defects in their personality or character are at fault for the underachievements.  
• Existential concerns.  Depression often occurs when people do not understand what their purpose is in life or why they have been put on Earth.  Severe religious or spiritual conflicts and moral and ethical dilemmas may also be of relevance in this category.    

     The causes listed above are only abreviated and highly generalized categories.  There are many more psychological causes of depression but, many of the causes will fit into one of those categories.  Those who may be afflicted with depression can take comfort in the facts that depression is highly treatable in many cases and that there are many experienced and qualified counselors and psychotherapists that can provide answers and treatment. Those who may be unsure if they are depressed or not could benefit from talking to a professional in the mental health field before things deteriorate further. Preventative measures can be taken to thwart depression before it becomes unmanageable which is perhaps the most preferred method of treatment.

Sincerely,

Nathan M. Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC

Nathan M. Comerford is a psychotherapist in Farmington Hills, MI who has been helping people with their relationship issues, emotional difficulties and mental health problems for the past 8 years. 

Thought Perspectives Counseling
31275 Northwestern Hwy., Suite 120
Farmington Hills, MI 48334
Phone: (248) 932-7799
www.thoughtperspectives.com

• If you or someone you know needs to speak to someone regarding relationship issues, emotional difficulties or mental health problems, help is a phone call away.  Schedule an appointment today!
  Just call (248) 932-7799 to set up an appointment with
  Nathan Comerford, MA LLPC NCC.
      
  Visit www.thoughtperspectives.com for more information on counseling and psychotherapy!
  
  Visit the "Ask the Counselor" Blog at:www.thoughtperspectives.com/blog
  
• This is a question and answer blog where Nathan answers questions concerning mental health topics.
•  If you have a question, you can send it to: questions@thoughtperspectives.com to have it answered by: Nathan Comerford, MA, LLPC, NCC.